"That's a long way down!" (yes, she's standing - leaning - but standing) Hmm... what could be holding her attention so strongly? The weather, of course! (SO intellectual...) Snif! My baby girl is old enough for her first attitude shirt. :) (It says, 'Miss Bee-having' - thus the post title - clever, no?) I told her as I put it on that means that she is a "miss" and she is behaving... no other options. :) I just noticed how red the area around her eyes is! Makes sense though - it was nap time and soon after this she conked out for her 2nd morning snooze. I know, I know... I'll miss these days someday. :) Sure enjoying them now, though!
On another note: did I mention that as of almost 2 weeks ago she was 15lbs, 5 ozs and 24-and-one-half inch? Yeah - she's a big girl now. I think my arms are getting thinner just carrying her around! (lol)
hey - I'm dressed WITH my dressed and sweet-smelling child sitting on my lap! I've made the bed, put on a little makeup, thrown a load of laundry in the wash and given Peyton a wipe-down - and it's only 11:15. what a difference an hour will make! I'm amazing! Humbled, actually. :) (and I've discovered that Peyton is perfectly happy to lay in her bassinet IN the bathroom while I maintain my personal hygiene. If she can see me, she's content. ) Praise God. I feel okay, and Kurt will have a somewhat put-together wife greeting him when he gets home for lunch. Uh-oh... her tummy is making suspicious rumbles - so I either have to prepare for an explosion on the back end or get her away from the keyboard quickly. This is not going to be ane-trade commercial! ttfn...
Let me just say what a great invention "Oatmeal-to-Go" bars are. Awesome, awesome concept. I actually feel nourished eating one. Awesome.
That, and I just have to admit how much I love washing my face in the morning. It makes me feel alive. I may be splotched with baby spit-up with my hair in a crazy ponytail, and I may still be wearing my pajamas... but my face will be clean, dagnabit. It's kinda like a controlled skid. Heading to the ditch - but picking the patch of snow you want to slide into. :)
Yep - it's been that kinda day already - and it's only 10 o'clock. (lol!)
Kurt, my love: on the 19th of January I had such plans to write a big, mushy romantic post listing all the 29 reasons I love you on your 29th birthday - or something. But our child had different plans - so obviously it never got written. In this particular case, I think that the day before Valentines I'm going to try to attempt to list as many things as I can before Peyton decides it's time I love her. Or at least 29 things. :) -- 1) You're sexy and I'm mightily attracted to you. Should I just stop now? ;) 2) You have such a great smile: it reaches all the way to your eyes. 3) The tiny wrinkles that those smiles have created. It shows your character. 4) The way you help out as much as you can with Peyton: diaper changes, feeding, walking with her - there really hasn't been a task you've refused. 5) The way you listen to me when I need to vent: even if it's venting about you. :) 6) The way you love my family: treating my brothers, parents, grandparents and everyone else with respect. 7) You're always happy to see me at the end of the day. Although sometimes Peyton gets kisses before I do, now - I'm never forgotten. 8) You're my handyman.You've fixed furnaces, floors, hung pictures, changed lights, tuned up a treadmill and change the oil in the vehicles on time. I have actually forgotten how to pump my own gas thanks to you. Wait - that isn't exactly true: it just took me a really long time to figure out the sequence last time I drove alone. :) 9) The way you seem to hate wearing socks, unless - of course - it's with a pair of flip-flops. In public. I think you just like to see my horrified reaction... 10) You handle nagging really well. Some men would flip-out... you just ignore me with a smile. (lol) 10) You've learned to trust my sense of style: it only took a few cans of paint - but you think I can decorate now - and you like it. :) 11) The way you'll pause in the middle of a task and tell me that you love me. 12) You aren't put off when I'm grumpy. And when I get grumpier because you're laughing at me, you manage to tease me out of it. Good job, Superman. 13) You vacuum. 14) You squeegee the shower after you use it. 15) You encourage me to get my hair done every month... and just kinda plug your ears when I tell you how much it cost after I get home. 16) You see the value of the time I spend with my mom and gramma when I get my hair done every month. :) 17) You not only love the Lord - but you encourage me to do so - you are a true leader. 18) You love our church family. 19) You handle it well when I say, "I told you so." about the Economist magazine. :-D 20) The way you'll still cry for Autumn - even holding Peyton in your arms. You've never pressured me to move on faster than I was able, or responded negatively when I've needed to remember or reminisce. 21) You're really smart politically. We did meet in Political Studies, after all... it's like our heritage. (lol) 22) You're not afraid to admit you've been wrong, or changed your mind about things: whether the aforementioned wall color, furniture arrangements or Obama... I like that you think about stuff enough to reevaluate opinions. 23) Your laugh: it's so hearty and genuine... and the way your face scrunches up is adorable. I love being the one to make you do that. :) 24) The fact that you wish you remembered our wedding day better. (S'okay, you look happy in the pictures... and only mildly dazed.) 25) The way it was important to you to come to all of my prenatal appointments last year. 26) That you strive to not fear the future: you attempt to be eager to see what else the Lord will bring across our paths. 27) The way you always threaten that I'll have to work full-time if you think I spend too much money. I'm sure that my laughter isn't the desired effect of that threat - but I love how you're consistent. ;) 28) The way you just shake your head and look at me with despair when Peyton starts to cry about 5 minutes into Lost each week. (big grin) 29) The way you're genuinely happy for other people when they receive wonderful gifts from the Lord - you're not an envious person.
I did it! Of course Peyton is squirming on my lap now - so not a minute too soon! :) I do love you, honey. I'm so proud to be your Mrs Manz. It wouldn't be hard to list 75 things I love about you - so I pray the Lord gives us at least that long together. :) Come home safe - we can't wait to see you. :) yours, kendall
I didn't even turn my computer on yesterday! I looked longingly down the hallway a couple of times - to where it sat cold and dark... but alas - no opportunity presented itself to even check email. Speaking of neglect - the child cries so I must sign off! :)
Peyton is quietly resting in front of the fire with nature/spa music playing in the background (I love Star Choice satellite). That's my cue to run around the house like a chicken who has everything above the shoulders cut off and do laundry, shower, tidy, dust, do dishes and make the bed. Oh yeah - and blog! :) Not necessarily in that order, though. I was willing to settle for a shower - but the nap is taking longer than I thought - so yay!
Anyway, today I was thinking about the future - wondering what it will hold and what the journey will look like. How - case in point - I was once a little helpless baby (probably) lying on the floor as my mom rushed around trying to get stuff done. How 28 years ago her life must have begun to settle into a routine with her firstborn child... and now it must seem like so very long ago.
I haven't asked her, but it must be strange for her to think of that little baby - and reconcile that memory with her only daughter who is now striving to make a life with a husband, car payments, laundry, cooking, cleaning, working - learning to be a Mommy. I know it's been hard for her to watch me grieve over Autumn, and the same heart rejoices with me over the birth and life of Peyton.
I look at Peyton - whose world is still so very small still - and pray that I have the opportunity that my mom has had to watch her daughter grow up and experience life in all it's craziness and hectic activity, with joys and even grief. I want to see my daughter not only function without me - but bloom into a girl, and then a young woman who has a husband, car payments, laundry, cooking, cleaning working - and yes - to even watch her become a Mommy.
For now it seems as though this period of life couldn't possibly end - when will my child not "need" me? And yet I know that is the way God designed it to be. Already she is "growing-up" - sitting straight, standing to her feet when pulled, head not bobbing at all... the signs are there if I ever look.
It's like when you're swimming you don't necessarily notice the distance - you're just thinking about the strokes and breathing and kicking (and in my case trying not to drown doing the stupid front-crawl... ick.) On days like this I feel kinda like a swimmer raising her head above the water and taking stock of how far from the shore she has come.
So thank you, Mom. I love that you can watch me love Peyton. Thank you for showing me how to function when I have a zillion things to do while my own little girl naps. Thank you for trying to raise me in a way that glorified God - and for showing me your love Christ with your life as you served Dad and our family. I pray for the same opportunity with my daughter - and that I can do it half as well as you did.
You know it's coming when the thermostat is set for 22 degrees (I have an infant in the house) and the actual temperature in the house is 23.5 degrees. Woo-hoo! I'm sure next week I'll sleep with the windows open! (Just kidding, Kurt.)
I'm realizing how much fun an almost 4-month old baby girl is. And that's a double-edged sword. This time last year we were in Phoenix. My "." had started and I realized that I was not pregnant after a month of (ahem) all the human effort possible. I was full of grief, fighting despair, and so very sad to come home to an empty home with an unused nursery and an unknown future.
Boy. A year can sure change things!
I need to remember - when tempted for feel far from God in the midst of this mind-numbingly busy and yet wonderful season - how closely He held me through what was without doubt the darkest valley I've ever walked though. He is so good - and I love Him so much. By His grace I've been able to say that in the worst parts of my life and now - one year later - in the best. Thanks to all of you who continue to honor me by sharing in my delights even as you did my heartache. I feel kinda boring now - but what a blessing that is! :)