Too Funny

On Another Note...

I'm off to Regina for a few days for my last nursing related event before the baby comes. It's a 4-hour drive (or 4 and 3-quarter hour drive according to google maps)- so I'm hoping to get away by 3pm so I can get there by 6 - 6:30. Not to mention drive in daylight through whitetail deer country... You should be able to click all those links and find out some extra details I'm not willing to type out right now. :)

I'm not that eager to go by myself - but the guy Kurt is working for has just over a week left for harvest (Lord willing) so he's going to stay and make sure that gets done sooner rather than later. I think he has recurring nightmares about being in a truck somewhere when my water breaks....

Anyway, I'm staying with my wonderful brother and sister in law - and there will be at least one of my coworkers there so I won't be completely by myself at the conference which should be very interesting - really. My lack of enthusiasm has more to do with the lower body discomfort and size of my belly than the content as slated in the brochure... chuckle.

Ye-gads! 34 weeks and counting....

My brother-in-law informed me they're taking me to Tony Roma's for supper... so I'll be starving myself in anticipation today. (grin)
What? It isn't like people will wonder where my appetite comes from... (chuckle)

Anyway, I should go pick out the music I'm going to listen to on my many-houred (word?) trip. Blessings, everyone!

Autumn's Headstone

We're very pleased with how it turned out - both quality of workmanship and the overall appearance. We had a surprise when we came home from church and noticed it in the graveyard... we weren't expecting it to be delivered for another month.

But - and this is the truth - I feel such a sense of satisfaction that it's there and it says what we want it to say. Who she was and what happened. How we feel about losing her. Trusting the One who has held us up. I feel that we've done something for her - and I really needed that.

It's the first time I've visited the graveyard since October 26th last year... and it was perfect. For this I praise God.

I'm Shameless...

Okay... this is a horrible thing to do.
Maybe not.
What the heck - here goes...

Out of all of you who read this thing and live in the booming metropolis of Saskatoon or somewhere within driving distance: who would be interested in coming to a Party Lite party I'm "hosting" at the Party Lite lady's house? :)

And... of those of you who may be interested: would you be available on the 15th of October? You can pat my oh-so-pregnant belly one more time before I'm induced...

Yeah, so - shock of shocks - this isn't a rhetorical group of questions. I really am 'hosting' a party Saskatoon on the 15th of October at 7pm.

Soccer friends. NEPS friends. 5100 coworkers. Church friends. Friends from none of the above-listed groups who - although I have not met you - just read the blog... All of you - you're invited.

If anyone from other provinces or the States want to fly over for my party I'd be flattered. I'd feel badly - but I'd hide it in the delight of seeing you. :)

So... yeah - wanna come? She said she could fit up to 50 in her house. I think that's overly optimistic... but who knows? :) Do I even know 50 people?

Regardless: I love Party Lite stuff - and it's just in time for Christmas for which they have LOADS of cute things... hint, hint, hint... check out the website by clicking the 'hint-hints'!

It also may be my last opportunity to get out and do some seriously woman-ish socializing before BManzII makes her arrival... and since the hostess provides drinks and snacks I'd need to know who'd be interested in coming and wishing me happy labour before it happens. :) You can RSVP to my email addy: mrsmanzatgmail.com (substitute the @ for at).

Really. Come. There is no pressure to buy (she's a good sales person) and it'll be a blast. :)

See? I really am shameless.
But what is the use of a blog if not to push my own agenda?
Bah-ha-ha-ha.... you must buy a candle....

It IS a Girl

A change to point out: I've added some of the blogs on my reader to the sidebar link. I figure if I enjoy ya'll so much I should let the rest do so also. :)

The ultrasound yesterday was delightful. That is simply the most descriptive way I can think of to describe it. We confirmed that she is - indeed - a girl. That part was very obvious and not hidden at all - much to our relief. But due to her position and the big pocket of fluid around her head we got to spend a really, really long time looking at her face. She's a chub! Seriously - this kid's cheeks and lips are so plump and healthy looking - even on the ultrasound. I'll see if I can cut and past a picture. For almost the entirety of the ultrasound she had her feet up by her head - but - again - thanks to the fluid we were still able to see her in all her chubby-cheeked glory. :) She would not open her eyes for anything, though - and at the end of the ultrasound declared it was over by unceremoniously rolling over and facing down. I hope she's more accommodating to pictures when she's born...

The tech spent a lot of time looking at her heart - all chambers and valves look healthy - and her little lungs are doing lots of practice breathing. We were even able to see the fluid moving in and out of her nose as she's preparing for the real thing. Everything is really well formed and although the cord is near her shoulder, there was (yesterday) nothing looped around or knotted. The only thing the radiologist said when he came in the room was, "She's a really big baby." No kidding: she's measuring 5 lbs 13 ounces! That estimate can vary a pound or two in either direction - but with the way I've been feeling it didn't shock me at all that she was so big. It makes me feel better about a 38 week induction, too! At this rate, she will still be almost 8-ish pounds - but that's better than a 9 pounder. :)

Check out those cheeks!!

Thanks so much for all your prayers...

11 Months

Yesterday it would have been Autumn's 11-month birthday. I can hardly believe it. All day it kept registering that it was the 21st - and that 11 of those markers have passed since she left us... but it seems so unreal at times. We've had so many changes. Moving, new jobs, renovations, another pregnancy - a new nursery with new things...This past year is difficult to describe. Overwhelming sorrow. Cautious enthusiasm. Unbroken trust. And just really, really missing our baby girl.
The sadness feels very near today, though. All the wondering what she would look and act like makes me realize that it will forever been an unknown. But it's also partially because I'm empathizing strongly with Molly as it is her daughter's one-year birthday today. If you think of it, pray for both of our families. Sadness deep in the heart is something only God can cure - but He uses the prayers of His people to accomplish that.
I'm listening to the words of Mercy Me's "My Heart will Fly" as I type and remember (it's on the player if you want to find it). It echos my heart today.

"Why this happened I can hardly explain -
Why write the script with such heartache and pain?
Could there not have been an easier way?
Watching life through this glass so faded - I cannot see the bigger picture taking place...
Oh to understand one day...
And my heart will fly - when I finally see you face to face
and my tears will fly away
It won't be long till we all go home
with all things revealed - and on that day we'll finally know
Oh - as we are fully known...
And what appears as incomplete
is still completely yours
and one day we'll see as we've been seen and we'll soar..."

I believe, Lord - help me in my unbelief!

Blessings to all of you,
k.

Post 5 of 9 (September 14-20)

The logic of the count is that I'll be posting the 9th the week we GO for induction. Like - this morning I'm 33 weeks - and that means I have five FULL weeks left to go. Just in case anyone was confused.

Kurt's been super-busy with harvest: he's been working consistent 12-15 hour days driving truck for the farmer he's working for. He's really enjoying it - even with the sleep deprivation. Last night when he got home (at 0030) I was actually still kinda awake so he showered in our bathroom (versus the one out by the kitchen) and then we half-consciously held hands until we fell asleep about 30 seconds later. Ahhh... the romance of harvest combined with the ardor of pregnancy... (lol!)

I hadn't mentioned it yet - but we get to have another ultrasound next week. I'm pretty excited - because normally we only get one at 18 weeks and if baby is fine then it is unnecessary to have others. But with our history the doctor thought it would be a good idea to check her out. The actual reason on the referral form? "Maternal reassurance". I'll take that. :) The smallest benefit of this would be making sure she really is a girl. :) The biggest delight is going to be seeing our baby at almost 34 weeks. I hope she's really active and I can figure out the parts that have been moving so much. I remember the huge difference it made with Autumn between the 18 week and 30 week ultrasound. Like: the difference between alien and human child (snicker). So that is exciting for both of us - pretty major understatement, that one. (grin)

I've also started begging off of shifts. (sigh) The waddle is getting more pronounced - as is the shortness of breath. That isn't anything I can't cope with at home - but getting in and out of the car and in and out of people's houses is acutely exhausting. Plus my pulse is still pretty volatile. Again - I can control it at home (when I feel it picking up I do the pregnancy equivalent of a full-stop: sit down, recline, feet up) but at work there isn't as much of an option for that. I would much rather control it with lifestyle than drugs... so fortunately I have a great group of coworkers who are really understanding.

Just so you can see how big I've gotten I'll post my 32 week picture (from last Friday). It's getting to the point where even I am wondering how big I'll be in another 5 weeks... zoiks. I've only gained 20 lbs - and have 5 weeks go... so that is actually really good (normal gain is 35-40 lbs) - but all I am is tummy and bum. Yes - I wrote bum on my blog. (grin) But I was definitely starting behind the 8-ball with this pregnancy because I hardly lost any weight from my pregnancy with Autumn. Lord willing, I'll have the time and energy and initiative to be healthy in the weight loss after this baby comes: not getting pregnant again 4 months after delivering this baby will probably help. (small smile)

To illustrate the delightful inconvenience of all this: Yesterday I had to take the truck for fuel and some groceries and my tummy touched the steering wheel - that doesn't happen in the car because of the telescopic steering column. Not a great thing when thinking about air bags... but for this, also, I trust God. :) But the point isn't so much that my tummy touched as that my feet almost didn't. (lol!) Hard to drive when you can't reach the pedals! Probably the last time I'll drive the truck until the baby is born...

32 weeks and counting...

Thanks for reading and praying, everyone...