My Dog is My Alarm Clock

Really. He is. Especially when Kurt isn't here...
I'm not sure how he got so clockwork... because even daylight is no cue with the mornings starting later and later... but - without fail (unless he's been up late or super-early) - that dog is in our room at 7:30 (give or take 5 minutes) every morning to notify us that he has "needs".

He comes in, goes around to Kurt's side of the bed, plops his oversize butt down, sits perfectly still and stares straight at you until you feel the eerie sensation of being watched. If you don't notice soon enough, he starts to breathe deeply. Not whine... just these long, drawn-out breaths that are impossible to ignore, and more impossible to sleep through. Now that I think of it, 'Vader' would have been a great name for him...

If he is sent out of the room, he sighs, leaves and comes back within 9 minutes. I'm not kidding... the dog also has a flippin' snooze button! He can hold his bladder for 10 hours each night - but don't make him wait 10 minutes longer in the morning than he is used to... chuckle.

And if that doesn't work he gets manipulative. He has this gigantic bone that he carries around the house - and never drops during the day... but if you're too slow off the uptake, that bone is dropped - fully dropped - on the ceramic tile outside our bedroom door. That gets us up in a hurry... and makes us feel badly for the guys in the basement. He's willing to take the reprimand for the drop, because it serves his goal...

Honestly - he is a borderline human.

So normally I don't care because he goes around to Kurt's side and my hubby-dearest must deal with the early morning stalker... but when he's out of town - guess who gets it?

Moi. I try to hide in the middle of the bed, but the dog is tall enough that he can simply change his position to peer at me from whichever angle is necessary to communicate his needs with the stares and breathing. Quite unnerving... but once you do move (saying things like, "Okay! I'm getting out of bed up you annoying grumble-grumble-grumble...") he transforms into a lively, excited, bash-in-the-drywall-with-his-tail kind of dog again.

The rest of his morning is equally consistent. He goes out, does his business quickly and runs back in to check his dog dish which I usually fill while he is outside. If it isn't filled, he stares with the saddest look on his face between me and it until I fill the dish. It is like he's thinking "You only had one task - how could you fail in it?" :) After eating, he'll take another trip outside to complete the business, and come back into play with a toy for 15 minutes before falling back asleep for another 2-3 hours... what a life! :)

What a companion. (snicker)

13 days to go! :)